Hey man sorry I got all grabby
im six kinds of drunk right now
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whose ass print is on the piano?
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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