What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
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