Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize