we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
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It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
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No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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