she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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