Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's always time for handjobs
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize