am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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