is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
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I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
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I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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