Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
tonight lets celebrate not being married
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize