We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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