life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Randomize