I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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