When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize