Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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