Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
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