You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize