Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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