My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Randomize