you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
A bitchslap is in order.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
We smell like vodka and hangover
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