you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize