I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
And then my night got REAL pukey
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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