Im at strip club and am horny
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize