I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize