Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
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