that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
its liver damage thursday
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