Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
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she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
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My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
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