i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Everyone says I win the strip club
Randomize