This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
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