Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
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