Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
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