You're so nebulous sometimes
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Bring me that man meat
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
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