so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Randomize