If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
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