Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Who wears a wallet chain?!
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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