It's like a parade of train wrecks.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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