yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize