I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he tried to convert me to islam
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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