Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
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