Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
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