I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize