I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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