Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
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