this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
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