Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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