dude i'm inner monologue high
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize