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  • Submitted by Mondu on Jun 16, 10 at 11:30am

    If it's "roses are red, violets are blue, I want a threesome with your sister, so I can fuck her too" then you probably aren't gonna get laid

  • 83 57
    Submitted by mordantmouth on Jun 16, 10 at 10:30am

    Isn't this a quote from Keats?

  • 84 75
    Submitted by gNarbog on Jun 16, 10 at 10:27am

    just because writing a poem might get you laid doesnt mean it doesnt make you a pussy for writing it.

  • 79 68
    Submitted by jprincess on Jun 16, 10 at 3:41pm

    How about..."silence is golden, duct tape is silver"....

  • 81 77
    Submitted by lawlessWV on Jun 16, 10 at 12:56pm

    There once was a man from Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night. To find that his dream had come true.

  • 78 79
    Submitted by highallthetime on Jun 16, 10 at 2:51pm

    Is a "fucking poem" about fucking?!

  • 85 93
    Submitted by gatormustang on Jun 16, 10 at 10:24am

    Ooooo, who lives in a pineapple under the sea?

  • 67 69
    Submitted by ojg15 on Jun 16, 10 at 10:25pm

    You misspelt him..

  • 58 61
    Submitted by sal22 on Jun 19, 10 at 10:07pm

    Shutup you dumbass you'll get Get laid if she feels like layin ya!

  • 64 76
    Submitted by californiaraisin on Jun 16, 10 at 1:12pm

    don't count on it, Nice Guy™

  • 65 82
    Submitted by zealous on Jun 16, 10 at 10:18am


  • 52 61
    Submitted by underagehangover on Jun 16, 10 at 2:51pm

    a fucking poem? like a poem about fucking?

  • 61 79
    Submitted by 23jordan23 on Jun 16, 10 at 10:18am

    I've done that before. It works everytime!

  • 62 82
    Submitted by thedood on Jun 16, 10 at 11:48am

    "There once was a man from Nantucket..."

  • 58 76
    Submitted by Betweenthebars93 on Jun 16, 10 at 10:19am

    Bfd. You should only get laid if it's a GOOD poem, not a limerick like I'm sure the OP wrote.

  • 56 73
    Submitted by britney09 on Jun 16, 10 at 5:55pm

    U wrote a fucking poem or a poem about fucking?! Please explain

  • 63 88
    Submitted by IfSheSpinsFast on Jun 16, 10 at 6:15pm

    Okay, theres is a lot wrong with this situation. You obviously have not slept with her yet, which means she is not yet your girlfriend. \nNow, me being a girl, I can say for sure, some random guy im not even dating writes me a fucking poem and he is not getting laid. Hes getting some pepper spray to the eyes and a restraining order. \nSo good luck.

  • 57 85
    Submitted by cjschmidt2 on Jun 17, 10 at 3:32am

    There once was a man from Nantucket,\nWith a dick so long he could suck it. \nHe said with a grin as he whiped off his chin, \n"If my ass was a pussy, I'd fuck it."

  • 59 90
    Submitted by Bear4 on Jun 16, 10 at 2:28pm

    Maybe she knows you are a suck up...maybe I'll get laid if u stop ass kissing and actually mean what u say :) yes?

  • 35 43
    Submitted by yewinnhard on Feb 1, 12 at 7:05am

    Ex boyfriend wrote me a poem. It was super shit. He didn't get sex.

  • 40 69
    Submitted by 697769 on Aug 19, 10 at 11:03pm

    Wow what a waste if time. I hate when guys do that kinda if stuff, just ask and I'll do anything. And no I'm not a slut

  • 45 83
    Submitted by E82Stud on Jun 20, 10 at 3:36am

    Why don't you learn how to play the guitar so you can be like every other douche bag jerkin off with his tears