dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
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