Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
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He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
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You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
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