just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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