you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
๐๐๐ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we werenโt furries
ok listen,
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize